Q&A With a Memory Care Professional

June is Brain Health Awareness Month. Throughout the month, we will explore different topics and perspectives, learning different ways to engage with our brain health along the way. For more information about Brain Health Awareness, click here.

When someone has dementia, life is changed in a multitude of ways all at once, as well as over time. These changes have an impact on people with dementia, as well as those around them such as caregivers, family members, and friends. Navigating life, whether you are someone with dementia or someone who loves a person with dementia, can be quite complex. You may still experience moments of joy, but people touched by the impacts of dementia often experience moments of grief, doubt, and exhaustion.

When facing life with dementia, it’s important to know that you are not alone. Questions pile up as you learn to navigate this new, often-changing, landscape. It can be incredibly overwhelming, not knowing where to turn for answers or guidance. We sat down with Erin Smith, the Regional Vice President of Operations at the William James Group, to gather answers to some frequently asked questions. Erin is a Certified Dementia Practitioner® (CDP®) as well as a trainer for CDP®. She has a wealth of knowledge regarding dementia care and is passionate about working with seniors.

Growing up, Erin and her siblings spent a lot of time with their grandmother, which meant they were frequent visitors and volunteers at the senior living community her grandmother worked at. Sometimes she even got to call bingo for the residents! While Erin has many memories of time spent alongside her family at the community, spending time with the residents throughout her childhood made a big impression. “We spent so much time [with our grandmother at the community] that we learned to appreciate and respect our elders. They are an at-risk population, vulnerable to all types of abuse. I wanted to be an advocate against that.”

Today, Erin works tirelessly advocating for seniors across the Southeastern United States, helping to train the current and future generations of caregivers, all while building meaningful relationships with seniors living with dementia and their families. Whether you or your loved one are living at home or call your senior living community home, Erin may have answers to some of the questions that cause you stress or anxiety as you navigate your dementia journey.

1.      What are some of the most frequent concerns you hear from loved ones or family caregivers regarding dementia?

“Family caregivers and loved ones are not always sure how to deescalate an agitated person with dementia.” No matter how pure our intentions are, trying to keep them rooted in our reality isn’t always the best option. Erin shared that trying to keep a person with dementia inside of our reality (or trying to bring them back to it) can be incredibly confusing for people with dementia, causing further agitation and confusion. “We should always live in their reality and redirect the conversation.”

2.       What advice do you have for family members and loved ones?

When someone you love is living with dementia, it can be an incredibly fraught time. It’s hard to preserve things as they were before dementia, and patience can be one of the hardest things for us to retain. Nevertheless, Erin encourages us to remember that, as hard as it is for us, the person with dementia is also having a difficult time “It is easier said than done but be patient with a person with dementia. They are having a hard time, too.” Erin also reminds us that maintaining a routine is very important for people with dementia.

3.      For families considering a memory care community for their loved one with dementia, knowing about the staff is so important. Are there requirements and training courses for staff members who work with memory care residents?

While all states vary with specific requirements, Erin assured us that specialized training materials are taught upon hire. If the community feels a refresher is in need, those specialized materials are also taught on an annual basis. “Our communities are constantly educating on the disease.”

4.      What would you say to families who’s loved one lives in a memory care community?

One of the most important things we can share is a reminder that you are not alone. Erin reminds us that other families in the community are a wonderful resource for dealing with the feeling that you are alone in this. “Know that you are not alone. Speak with other family members in the community, too.”  While no one can love mom or dad in the exact same way as you, trust your care team. “We understand the guilt you feel when looking for placement options,” Erin shares. Most of the time, though, you will find that “your loved one can thrive in an environment that is specialized for them.”

5.      What are some of the worries or concerns that dementia patients have?

Erin notes that “people with dementia are often still living in a world in which they worked, their children were still small, and/or their parents were alive.” We often see people with dementia trying to leave for work, or upset because they can’t find their parents, or their young children. With dementia, reality becomes distorted. It is so important that we live in their reality with them, redirecting conversations to avoid upsetting our loved one with dementia.

6.      Do you have any advice for loved ones who are looking for ways to show up for their loved one after they’ve moved to a memory care community?

Erin encourages quality time; a reminder that often the quality of the time we spend together is more valuable than how long it lasts or what we do during that time. “Focus on the quality time, not the quantity. Celebrate the small wins, they matter!” It doesn’t have to be extravagant to qualify. “Just letting them lead the way can make a big impact.”

At The Residence at Oak Grove, we believe in changing the discourse around dementia, ensuring that all of our residents with dementia and their loved ones feel a sense of belonging. We strive to cultivate an atmosphere where every memory care resident can thrive, as Erin said before, in an environment specialized just for them. For more information, contact us today!